Thursday, 23 June 2011

Impatient me

Oh gosh, you would think after nine months that my ability to be patient would have increased, or at least because less frustrating! BUT it hasn't, not even a little bit!!

Today is cycle day 36 and I have been praying for maintenance week (AKA my period) for about 10 days.  But there's still no sight of it.  Hubby even suggested taking a pregnancy test to make sure we hadn't all been wrong and secretly popped an egg we didn't know about.  But that was negative, like always.  So we keep waiting, which is hard because we know that as soon as it's here our new course of treatment starts.  Argh, all this waiting is aging me scarily!!

Hubby's always keen to put a positive spin on our current situation, which is helpful until it's not!  Make sense?  Well, we both firmly believe that everything is part of God's plan for us.  And that the circumstances in our lives are here to help us learn something.  Hubby has always been adamant that God put us together to teach me patience, among other things.  I knew for a FACT that Hubby and I were supposed to be married after we'd been dating for about two years.  I didn't get why, after I told him this, he didn't agree.  We got engaged a little after 12 months later.  I then had to convince Hubby that living together briefly before we got married was a good idea.  We moved in together two months before our big day (and only because both our rent agreements were due for renewal).  After our wedding we discussed the perfect time to start a family.  I thought one year was long enough to wait, Hubby insisted on two.  

So you see, our whole relationship I've had to wait patiently for something that I wanted!  All big things, no doubt, but aren't they the hardest things to wait for?  And all this time (six years in September) Hubby has maintained the argument that his purpose in my life is to make me MORE patient!  And that this new episode in our lives is just another learning experience for just that.  

Well, I'm done learning, I'm tired of being patient!  I want what I want, and I want it NOW!! 

2 comments:

  1. Oh do I ever know what you mean! Nothing but sympathy!

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  2. I completely understand! I think it is a womanly thing to always be looking to the future. Men seem to be able to live in the moment much more. Sorry you're having to wait on your dreams! I feel like a kid in a candy store throwing the most awful tantrum you've ever seen when I think about my own wait.--Just yelling and kicking and screaming! Sometimes that's all I feel like doing!

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