Our two year anniversary and invitation to the waiting game

So a few little significant timelines are meeting up today in the world of Sunny and Hubby.  It is our second wedding anniversary, of which I am so proud, in-love and joyous about.  It was also our post-op follow up appointment since I had my ovaries drilled.  On a whim I decided to OPK test last Sunday, just to prove to Hubby that my foul mood was in fact not PMS.  Only to find a very bright set of double lines.  Could I really be spontaneously ovulating so soon after my op?! So today marks the start of the 4th week of this cycle and the beginning of the second week of waiting.

Anyhoo, my doc was very excited to hear about out miraculous ovulation and gave us options for the weeks ahead, stipulating that we don't have to make final decisions until we know for sure if I'm pregnant.  He used the phrase "you might be pregnant, you know" about 10 times in our short 30 minute session, leaving Hubby and I smiling throughout the whole process.  He told us not to bother testing for Hcg levels until at least next Wednesday (5 & 1/2 weeks), if I hadn't got my period by then.  But, according to all my test results, we should have around six months of unassisted fertility up our sleeves to play with if I do.  So Hubby and I will stay home, use our OPK's and "lots of timed sex" and pray for the best.

Going through our history with us again, as doctors do, he casually pointed out that today would mark 12 months of us trying to get pregnant.  Really, already?  And counting back the weeks in my head from the time we lost our first pregnancy I realised he's right!  How did I not put those two together before?  Our first anniversary marked the approximate day of conception the first time around.  Was baby number one an anniversary baby?  Could we be blessed enough to have it also mark four weeks into our second?  And if it does, how do I feel about that?  All our dates from the year before would coincide so similarly it makes my brain (and my heart) hurt!  

So, in order to maintain a certain level of calm in the storm, I am choosing not to think about that right now.  I know the 10th of October will come and go with sorrow, but I will pray that new life and new joy will replace the depth of that sorrow with overwhelming happiness this year.  Next Wednesday now feels like a lifetime away and all I can think about is making sure I don't get my period.  And so we wait...